A Different Kind of Writer's Block

 

Many people have heard of or suffered from writer’s block. Writer’s block occurs when there is a requirement to write, but you are unable to. Most writers describe it as not being able to put the words on the page, or not being motivated, or being in a slump and writing ‘crap’ instead of meaningful prose.  For the professional writer it can be a very painful experience.  Periods of writer’s block can last hours, days, or for some, months.

I’ve been working on Volume Two of Love and Text Messages for over two months, and I’m barely done with chapter 1.  My deadline is less than a week away.  I doubt that I will make it.  This means I will have a strong conversation with my publisher this week, or shortly after this blog is posted. Nonetheless, I’ve been dealing with writer’s block for almost 3 weeks. I’ve had writer’s block before and have dealt with it a number of ways such as, taking a break, going on vacation, or using basic techniques in writing to get myself going again.  All of those techniques seem to be failing me this time around.

I was getting angry with myself as I know that many people are anxiously awaiting the release and I didn’t want to let anyone down.  It wasn’t until I had a conversation last night with my FWB that I realized what was going on with me any why I couldn’t write.

FWB and I had our typical catching up-like conversation and we talked about the things that were going on in our lives as of late.  He had just returned from a swinger’s party the night before and was recuperating.  He had also hit up a party the week before too – without me.  I didn’t mind not rolling with him because a few weeks ago I had made a decision that I was going to lay low for a while.  We talked for about 40 minutes on the phone trading stories of what life had been like for us.  He was having a great time. I, on the other hand, was doing none of the things that I liked to do. I was doing ‘normal’ shit. 

I have two new business ventures that I’m working on and I felt like I need to have clarity of mind to get through the planning stage.  Plus I’m scheduled to meet some new business partners and I wanted to be sharp.  So I began this new regimen to get ready.  It was the perfect thing to do – so I thought.  I began to exercise. I hate to exercise.  I’m actually anti-exercise, yet I was walking about 2-3 miles every other day.  I had reduced the amount of alcohol that I was drinking on a daily basis, because I thought it might help me shed a few pounds.  I actually went to the gym a couple of times with a friend and lifted weights too.  I cut back on carbs, and gave up caffeine. I hadn’t gone to any parties or clubs and I certainly didn’t smoke as much weed as I had in the past. As a matter of fact I’ve only had a half of joint in the last month.  So let’s just say I’m pretty much detoxed at this point. Real good sex on the regular has even become a thing of the past

I spent my days surfing the net, watching TV, or staring at a blank page. I did things with my kids and family but none of my normal outgoing activities. Life was good.  Life was lame.

These are the things which I shared with FWB on the phone. And there came my ah-ha moment … The reason why I couldn’t write. I was just too fucking sober.  I had reduced my life down to a status-quo rut that I didn’t believe in.  Why the hell was I doing this to myself? There is good reason to want to put your life on the right track. But the right track for everybody else is the wrong track for me.  I need adventure, stimulants, and a few good hangovers.  I broke my own rule to living an authentic life: To thine own self be true. And so I will. I may keep doing my 2 mile walks from time-to time, but I will walk to the liquor store and back and then raise my cup when I return.  Instead of watching TV until I feel motivated to write I will light up a fat one and then turn on the computer.  And instead of looking forward to a quiet weekend at home alone, I will look forward to the next all-night party adventure.

I still may miss my deadline, but I will surely feel better knowing I have stirred some things up and created excitement for myself instead of just letting life go by.  Writer’s block be gone!

~Natalie

Read more about FWB and what he meand to me in Love and Text Messages Volume One:

Read about my books at www.loveandtextmessages.com or purchase at:
http://www.amazon.com/Love-Text-Messages-Volume-Summer/dp/0985182709/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1331341156&sr=8-1